{"id":16821,"date":"2025-08-22T15:47:33","date_gmt":"2025-08-22T21:47:33","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/dh.durangoherald.com\/tj\/think-win-win-part-2\/"},"modified":"2026-03-30T22:02:05","modified_gmt":"2026-03-31T04:02:05","slug":"think-win-win-part-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dh.durangoherald.com\/tj\/think-win-win-part-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Think win-win, Part 2"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Ron
Ron Price<\/span>cca<\/span><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/p>\n

Last time I wrote about the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People by Dr. Stephen R. Covey, focusing on Habit Four: \u201cThink Win-Win.\u201d Hopefully, I made the case that while a win-win outcome may not always be attainable, it is always helpful to maintain an attitude of thinking win-win whenever you are in a dispute or negotiation with others.<\/p>\n

This week, I want to give you an outline that may help you in this endeavor.<\/p>\n

Susan Heitler, Ph. D., is a clinical psychologist in Denver. She developed a tool called the Win-Win Waltz Worksheet. You begin the Win-Win Waltz by having each person specify his or her initial position on the subject in dispute. Positions, as you\u2019ll soon discover, are often not what is actually at stake and often not even what the person really wants. That\u2019s what makes the next step so important.<\/p>\n

Once the initial positions are identified, you then detail each party\u2019s underlying concerns. Here is where you might ask the shortest question in the English language, the question we tire of hearing from young children \u2013 \u201cWhy?\u201d. Ask yourself and the other person, \u201cWhy do you want this?\u201d Or, put another way, \u201cIf you got what you\u2019re asking for, what would that do for you?\u201d Once you\u2019ve asked this question, you must listen carefully for the answer. When people argue from positions, as we all have done, there is often no win-win outcome possible. When they discuss from the standpoint of true interests, there may be many ways for each to get what they truly need.<\/p>\n

So, in the second step of the Waltz, each party lists as specifically as possible what their underlying concerns and true objectives are. I guess there\u2019s no limit to how many each party may bring to the table, but it seems that meeting a few true objectives well is preferable to meeting numerous lesser needs only moderately. I\u2019ll leave that up to you to decide.<\/p>\n

Once you\u2019ve identified each party\u2019s positions and underlying concerns, you are now ready to consider options. At this point, each party suggests a potential resolution that seeks a win-win outcome. Chances are that one of these proposals may be totally acceptable to both, and the matter is resolved. What might also happen, however, is that a totally new idea may develop, which has components of each one\u2019s suggestions. Don\u2019t be surprised if that new idea spurs another and perhaps another.<\/p>\n

I do not have a \u201cpie-in-the-sky\u201d outlook on life, nor do I believe we live in a perfect world where all disputes can easily be resolved. I\u2019ve lived long enough to know that\u2019s not the case. I\u2019ve also learned, however, that one of the most important steps in resolving a dispute is the attitude each one brings to the negotiating table. If you perceive the other as your enemy, your adversary, then you must take steps to protect yourself from their \u201canticipated\u201d attacks. You might be led to follow the adage that \u201ca good offense is better than a good defense\u201d (actually, I think the true adage is the reverse, but you know what I mean).<\/p>\n

Because you view the other in a negative light, you will likely treat him or her negatively. If indeed he or she is your enemy, then all of your defensive moves make sense. If, however, you could somehow look at the other as an ally, as one who has an interest in resolving the matter with you, then treating them negatively makes no sense at all. By striving to view the other as an ally rather than an enemy \u2013 at least until proven otherwise -you are in a much better state of mind to resolve your differences both in the short term and the long.<\/p>\n

Though conflict management is not always easy, I wholeheartedly recommend you implement Think Win-Win and the Win-Win Waltz in your important relationships. I\u2019m confident you\u2019ll be glad you did.<\/p>\n

Shirttail: Ron Price, who has a master\u2019s degree in counseling from the University of New Mexico, is author of the \u201cPlay Nice in Your Sandbox\u201d book series and creator of the CPR Mastery video course. He is available for workshops and staff training. Contact Ron at ron@ronprice.com<\/a> and (505) 324-6328. Learn more at ronprice.com.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

theory to practice with the \u2018Win-Win Waltz\u2019<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":13307,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[1091,29],"naviga_topic":[],"class_list":["post-16821","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","tag-columns","tag-newsletter"],"acf":[],"author_name":"dh_admin","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dh.durangoherald.com\/tj\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16821","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dh.durangoherald.com\/tj\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dh.durangoherald.com\/tj\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dh.durangoherald.com\/tj\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dh.durangoherald.com\/tj\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=16821"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/dh.durangoherald.com\/tj\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16821\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":20410,"href":"https:\/\/dh.durangoherald.com\/tj\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16821\/revisions\/20410"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dh.durangoherald.com\/tj\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/13307"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dh.durangoherald.com\/tj\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=16821"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dh.durangoherald.com\/tj\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=16821"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dh.durangoherald.com\/tj\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=16821"},{"taxonomy":"naviga_topic","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dh.durangoherald.com\/tj\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/naviga_topic?post=16821"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}